The NHS is brilliant


I’ve had a lump inside my eyelid for a couple of months. It’s not bothering me, but since it’s not going anywhere on its own, and there is a slight chance that something has burrowed in there and decided that it’s a good place to gestate, I figured I should get some advice about it.

I’ve not had contact with a GP for a long time, probably five years or more. Getting in touch with them used to be a real pain, and involved ringing again and again until the lines were free. Technology marches ever onwards, and the website says that I can now book online. I’m asked whether it is urgent or non-urgent, and then fill out a short questionnaire: where is it, does it hurt, is it speaking telepathically in an alien language? They will contact me within five days, I am told. That’s reasonable. I’m in no rush.

Twenty minutes later, I receive an SMS asking me to go back to the website and submit photos of my eye. Another SMS tells me that someone will be in touch. Two hours later, a doctor calls. He’s friendly, reassures me it’s benign, gives me some self-care instructions and tells me to let them know if it does anything ‘weird’.

Total time from start to finish: 3 hours. Cost to me: £0.

The NHS is brilliant.